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Something I thought that was funny

  • Feb. 6th, 2009 at 9:05 PM
Black and White Me

Dear World:

The United States of America, your quality supplier of the ideals of liberty and democracy, would like to apologize for its 2001-2008 service outage.
 

The technical fault that led to this eight-year service interruption has been located. Replacement components were ordered Tuesday, November 4th, 2008, and have begun arriving. Early tests of the new equipment indicate that it is functioning correctly and we expect it to be fully operational by the end of January.

We apologize for any inconvenience caused by the outage and we look forward to resuming full service -- and hopefully even improving it in the years to come. Thank you for your patience and understanding.

Very Truly Yours,

The USA

Stolen from Jumbojoke.com
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A letter to my subconsious

  • Dec. 9th, 2008 at 6:01 PM
Black and White Me

Hello my friend I miss you. I haven't talked to you in ages. I know your still there, you always were there when I needed you. I know that I have ignored you for to long. For that I am sorry, but life has a way of getting in the way. I was forced to leave, and then I couldn't stand the pain of your loss so I forgot. Please take me back my friend, please take this pain from me.

We have talked again, I know that you are hurt by my abandonment. I just couldn't handle the pain. I had to leave was given no choice you know that. I am sorry that I didn't keep up with you. I am sorry really I will never hurt you again. At least not on purpose or with no reason.

 

You talked to me again today I was overjoyed to hear your voice, afterwards I was drained. It was like getting really tired. I hate to hear that you are unhappy, I wish I could make it better but right now I am in no position to help, soon soon....

 

I hear your words but the meaning escapes me. You tell me one thing but your tone tells me another, what is real. I hope that you will open up and be honest with me. I know you hurt, just let it out.

 

Well old friend it is good to hear from you again. You sound so much better now that we have talked. Sorry to have kept you waiting on the truth, but I had to wait for you to ask. That meant that you were ready to hear it. The truth is hard but when you ask you know that you brought it on yourself. Please don't blame me for it. It is your truth, not mine. I hope you understand what I mean old friend.

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In Case you missed it.

  • Dec. 9th, 2008 at 5:56 PM
Black and White Me

The Unwanted, Unknown

I am fear, the darkness in your breast

I am what you feel in retreat the blackness at you back

I am nothing to everything and everything to nothing

I am unwanted yet I want you I am unknown yet I know you

I am unseen yet I see you I wait in you for the right time

I wait for the blackness to rise for that is when I come

I wait for the hate to spill forth ready to spill life

I hate for without that I am nothing

I am wild uncontrolled and uninhibited unfettered

I am that lunacy the looks to the moon

I am that animal that craves the kill the bite

I am anger out of hand drinking your sanity

Drunk on this world of lies and illusion bigotry

Hypocrite Bigot Liar I am all these and more

If you find it wrong there I am

If you see evil I am not far

I am yourself I am inside waiting

You will be drunk and there I am

You will be jealous and I am near

You will be angry and I will control

You dont want me but I am there

You cant control me if I am here

I want you I control you if you slip

Your control weakens everyday your honor is balanced

Your heart is heavy you are tired

I fight you every step all the time no rest for me

I am wicked I am hard I am a mountain in your soul

I weigh you down I slow your steps

Death would be to light a feather would be as a stone

Life is your only choice and the battle is waged

You draw a line I step across you give all the time

Lies Greed Hatred

these are my weapons these are my tools

I trade you pearls for stones Life for Death

I take away all that you hold dear all that you love

I give nothing in return

You may win but I am always around the next corner waiting

Watching and Listening for my cue

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Dec. 9th, 2008

  • 5:47 PM
Black and White Me
Most people who remember school only learned one thing, how to meet new and interesting people. Schools no longer teach how to learn do you know how to learn? Do you have an interest in learning? Well I know that I want to learn; about life and take that information and turn it into knowledge, which means to use it. How many of us humans use our knowledge to help ourselves let alone others? Do celebrities know more about life than we do, I doubt it, how many celebs go to rehab, how many are caught doing human things like making mistakes? We all make mistakes. Can you imagine not having a private life? I never want to be famous I like being me, not having to live for a camera. I would like to remind all of you who read these to think for yourselves stop being sheep. Stop living the lives the media tells you to. FOR GOD SAKES STOP listening to the mass media they are a corrupt organization that want a story not the facts. By the media I mean advertisements newspapers or TV. What to they know that we can't find out? We have the freedom of information to look up anything that interests us and where do we take it? We look at porn (#1) stupid human tricks (#2) or random facts that are unverifiable (#3). Why because we never learned how to learn! I don't know how to learn, other than to keep trying don't take the first thing that comes across your plate, look up their source and then their source all the way back to the beginning. That way it might actually stick and you can tell someone later that it is true to the best of your knowledge
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To those who Know

  • Dec. 9th, 2008 at 5:39 PM
Black and White Me
What friends do you have that twist and turn your thoughts. What friends do you have that help you think down new paths.

This is to IWEUS.

 

The Angled mind speaks

Its twist in thought vocalized

Right angle to all else

The turn you took without turning a corner

The path that lead you to here

When life sways you where already there

Here is a state of mind

The present is not where you are

The past is how you are

The future is what you want

Fear is another side

Death is the begining

Life is an ending

To laugh a start

To cry a part

The Journey is yours ours mine

To where do you look for the Angle of you mind

What is your bent

Here is you Handbasket, I've got mine

Check you good intentions

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Writer's Block: Set Sail

  • Dec. 9th, 2008 at 10:16 AM
Black and White Me

Spike and Angel, President Roslin and Gaius Baltar, Harry and Hermione—shippers often find pairings that the original author might have overlooked. What coupling of fictional characters would you most like to see?

View 506 Answers

Honestly, authors aren't stupid. If they lead you one way with love and then took an abrupt about face they ment to do that. Writing is not about being predictable, it is about keeping you guessing. If all the obvious pairings happend in books and movies we would live in a very diffrent world. Think about the rammifications. That would mean that art immitated life, so there fore all the obvious pairings in the real world would happen. How many people do you know that should have gotten together but didn't? How much would that change the world we live in?
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Dec. 5th, 2008

  • 10:05 PM
Black and White Me

Justice, what is justice? Is justice punishment of a crime? Is justice a mind set? Justice to me is a fact, not an opinion; concrete justice. Justice should not be viewed as an abstract concept open to interpretation; it must be applied equally to everyone. None shall  escape justice. Also, justice should be there for the protection of others. I shall endeavor to help you make up your mind about justice.

            “Justice is equality. Everyone should be treated the same. No matter how tall you are, how big you are, no matter how old you are, no matter what your name is, no matter who your parents are, no matter what you look like, you should be treated the exact same way as anyone else. If we come up with good rules, they should be applied evenly and equally too,” Alaine (age 9) from West Virginia University. From the mouths of babes, well at least someone who should not have had such a clear and concise view of such an abstract concept. Justice to the young is simple, all should be treated fair. I believe that is what our fore-fathers have desperately tried to secure for us down through the years. It has not always been that way. 

“Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity,” W.B. Yeats 1st stanza, Second Coming.

            This quote I feel is an accurate representation of the lack of justice. The part about “The centre cannot hold,” is brilliant. Without justice things break down and fall apart. Justice is the nail that holds society together, without that nail we lose grip on each other. Without justice we all become armed camps, one against the other. For without justice our sense of right and wrong falls apart, we would be like children not knowing what we do. Justice should not be broken down by punishments and money, or crime and time; justice just is. We all know when justice has not been served; for example sitting down to dinner and finding out that you have no spot at the table, this leaves you out in the cold, alone and wanting.

            “Justice without force is powerless; force without justice is tyrannical” Blaise Pascal. Truth and justice are inextricably linked, truth is the centre of justice, and without this center justice is not served. When a law is enacted that lacks truth it does not serve justice. Truth allows justice to do its job. Justice without truth is an injustice; how could you know who deserves the punishment or how much punishment they deserve? Tyrannical governments enact unjust laws or laws without truth, to control people. These unjust acts are what causes most tyranny’s to fall; because people know injustice when they see it and rebel against it. In our own country’s founding there was a gifted few to whom justice was more than just a word. They fought oppression and injustice; these few changed the face of the world, and history was made in their image. Why? I think they fought because they saw no other choice; when the government no longer represents the people, the people must show them the error of their ways. How do we know this? When a person acts upon us unjustly, we know it. Humanity may not be able to define justice, but we do know when we are not receiving it. Think about all the times in your life when someone acted unjustly towards you, what do you say? “That’s not fair.” Why do we do this, because deep down inside us we all know an unjust action. With the ability to see an unjust act, why then can we not define justice appropriately? 

Clarence Darrow once said, “You can only protect your liberties in this world by protecting the other man's freedom. You can only be free if I am free.” I think that this sums up the lack of justice in our world. We have become a society so used to injustice that we blithely ignore the injustice of our neighbor, only to insure that tomorrow it could happen to us. Our American society is so insular to our immediate needs; our instant gratification culture, that we cannot and will not interfere into another’s life because we might bring it upon us. Is that justice, as long as it doesn’t happen to me I am okay? I refuse to believe that justice acts in such a way.

In our society now, justice means “crime and punishment;” we have also proven that justice can be bought, Justice may be blind, and in that way she is unable to reveal who paid her off. I believe we need to wipe the records clean and try again with our justice system. I also believe that we need to remove the shroud from Justice and show her the injustices done to her. We take justice for granted in our society, as long it doesn’t happen to us we are okay. Wrong, this encourages the unjust to continue their rape of our sensibilities. The very fact that we allow this would make every one who has fought and died for our liberty to cry out and give up. We, as a society, have given the truth to this quote, “Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both," Benjamin Franklin. We have given up on justice in the hope that injustice will not be visited upon us. In doing so, we may have to stand up for our rights to Truth, Justice, and Liberty.     

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How we got here

  • Dec. 5th, 2008 at 10:02 PM
Black and White Me

How we got here

(Or; Why men and women should just plain avoid each other).

          One day while thinking on why another one got away, I had an epiphany; you know, those things that are generally followed by “Eureka.” It came to me that, “Men and women should just plain avoid each other. Procreation is all well and good, but is having another you or them around worth it?” Looking at life through this epiphany, I noticed something. People come in three types: The Broken, The Addicted, and The Destroyers. Now I know you’re sitting there thinking, “What is this guy smoking and where can I get some?” Trust me, you can’t smoke it and you wouldn’t want to if you could. These three types of people tell me one thing, “How *in the name of Jesus pogo-sticking across the Sea of Galilee*, did I get here.” This is our story.

            The Broken, you know them, you loath them, and you’ve dated them. We have all at one time or another met and/or dated this person. He may look like James Bond in a suit, but he’s really a thirty something living in mommy’s basement. These distraught individuals, as cute and winsome as they are, can’t function properly without someone’s apron to cling to. Damsels in distress fall into this category, if they hadn’t have made the evil witch/ stepmother mad they wouldn’t have been put in the tower or given the poison to make them sleep. Also, why would they ride off with the first guy to kiss them? Really, standards people. Maybe they got addicted to falling prey to others?

            Ahh! The Addicted, those wonderful people who convince you that, “it’s not a habit I can quit anytime I want. By the way, would you mind getting me some more?” I think at one time the world was full of these types, at least that would explain the Dark Ages. This beautiful lady must have her shoes/make-up/clothes/shopping spree… you get the picture. How have they survived, by leeching from those stupid or inexperienced enough to get them what they want. Why or how they have bred, I can’t imagine. How desperate do you need to be, to be with some one who spends your paycheck even before you get it? Really, REALLY, desperate, trust me, why do you think I am broke and in college? If anyone has a way of getting rid of this type let me know, I could use the help. If I could become a destroyer, would I be able to just leave?

            Now we get to the ones who prey on the other groups, The Destroyers. Giving just a taste here, or a kind word there, stringing along the Broken and the Addicted, and giving just enough to keep him sniffing around, and her at his beck and call. Why do we put up with this? Because they are that damn cool. These bad boys and girls are the ones who ride off into the sunset and leave you to pay the bill and we allow it. Because we got to hang with the coolest of the cool. These Bikers, Cowboys, Racecar drivers, and Gamers are everything our parents told us to stay away from. Sadly, we went to them anyway, all out of a misplaced sense of rebellion. Most of this type dies in horrible and humorous ways, all after saying, “Watch this,” or “You think I can’t?” or the unforgettable “is this thing on?” Unfortunately these are the ones that leave a trail of the Broken and Addicted for the rest of us to pick over. Really, why do they have to take all the good ones? Why am I always the safe “gay” friend, and how do I get into that elite group of destroyers?

            Alas, the Broken and the Addicted are at the mercy of the Destroyers. After the Destroyer ends himself in a drunken brawl at the local midget bar, before finding out that midget tossing is illegal, and that these midgets have all had formal combat training in the munchkin reserves, this leaves the other two, lets call them mom and dad, to look at each other, and say “You wanna?” Nine months later there you are bouncing and laughing, starting the cycle anew. Evolution in action folks; isn’t science wonderful?

 

 

            * Stolen from a friend with permission*

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Last Day of Quarter!!

  • Dec. 5th, 2008 at 9:43 PM
Black and White Me
     Well it was the last day of the quarter today at college, it was a bittersweet day. I love learning new things, like that I can write well. I was going to go for a psychology degree, then surprisingly enough, found out I like to write. My eng101 teacher was impressed with my writing, even said to me one day that the reason she thought that I was not getting responses on peer review was because I was writing above their level. I just think that these people never really had the chance to think about things from a different perspective before. I have lived an interesting life so far and I am still young. I decided to try for journalism when my thoughts about psych turned sour. I just don't think I have the mindset to believe I can fix someone when I can't even fix myself. I am going to miss those days of standing in a circle playing hac, talking with interesting people, and coming up with new ideas. Although it is really nice to think about not having to get up early, I probably still will, darn kids. I find it interesting how fast I seemed to take to college. On one hand I want to think that it is the old high school reflexes stretching, but I feel that it is more than that. In eng101 I was the overachiever, this didn't ostracize me, in fact they were more likely to read my paper because I pushed myself. I just wished that translated to more than " wow that was good," or "I didn't get that one part." I am not trying to down my fellow students, I know that I see things from a different perspective than most, and they had never thought of it that way. Which is what I think blocked their ability to comment. I think what I will miss the most for this break is the conversations with my friends, I learned so much from these conversations that it amazed me.
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Strong Opinions

  • Dec. 2nd, 2008 at 10:24 PM
Black and White Me
I have many strong opinions, not many are popular and very few mean anything in the big picture, but I have one or two rattling around in the caverns of my mind.

Religion to some is a dirty word to others it is held as on of the sacred artifacts created by a divine being.

I learned that not all religions are practiced as they are suppose to be. My parents joined a church, before I was born. This preacher had taken them in and controlled thier lives with peer pressure. I am sure my mom would have divorced my dad a lot earlier in life had it not been for the peer pressure. I look back at this church and see a cult. One man and his harridan of a wife, creating a cult around one story in the bible. Preachers are chosen by God and don't question them. Funny I spent a lot of time looking for that in the bible and couldn't find it. I was even named after that common man, that's why I hate my middle name. Not for the name itself but for who I was named after. Slowly I am getting over it, but I doubt I will ever truly get over it. That experience colored my thought on religion in an ugly way.
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